On: Friday, October 24, 2008
All in all, I'm just posting to say that I'm going to be gone, and if you want to check out my stuff, you can follow me on twitter :D
I'll still be posting on twitter.
Just not blogger.
I'll be back Monday ;)
On: Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Check my inbox, log out. Check my inbox, log out.
It seems that facebook just isn't worth it. It's bloated, and over-kill as a website.
The apps take up to much room, and it's annoying to get requests to try out some apps.
Really, I've started using Blogger for my "social" thing, and twitter to keep people knowing what I'm doing.
I use facebook for messaging. That's it.
Really, facebook is like some address book for me.
But, Blogger feels fresh. It is built around learning about people, and information.
Those are two things that I like :D
But, I digress.
Really, facebook has become bloatware.
And, I do defend that.
Either way, I will continue to use facebook until I find something better (which I haven't managed to yet).
If you have any suggestions, please do tell :D
On: Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Lala, a music website that has struggled at times has come up with a new service that lets you buy music on the internet for pennies!!!
You can't put the music on a music player, but you can listen to it on the interwebs.
You can also buy the actual album, but why?
It's worth it in the world, and it's going towards the future ;)
This is the site
It is pretty cool really.
But, onwards with the day.
My day started off... weird. Why? I ended up with Mr. Williams, who is probably the strangest teacher in existence. He pretended to get sucked into his desk, threatened to fart on a student, and made a strange laugh at random intervals. So, he has me creep'd out. He seems like a decent teacher though... just creepy.
Geometry was pretty boring really. It was made up mostly of silence, and short conversations. I found the teacher was mostly unassertive, and almost seemed nervous around us. It'll take some time to get used to this class.
Speech, speech, speech, speech. I have a lot to say about Speech.
I have Speech with Macey and Makayla. This is an amazingly cool thing, but, it's also amazingly frustrating.
To me, they are at times overly chatty, and upon entry to the class they took the liberty to hug me despite the rule against PDA (Public Display of Affection).
Really, it's cool to get hugged by your friends. But, it's not cool to openly break rules in class. It's just not right. Also, this makes the class different for me. I've never been in class with either of them, and they both talk a lot. It's hard for me to concentrate when people are talking, and they have reasons to talk to me. I'm Macey says I'm her "bestest friend", and I'm like one of Makayla's best friends too. I don't think I can recall having a class with anybody that was seriously my best friend.
They also read body language a lot, so at times they think I'm "sad" when I'm not. That gets annoying, and opens up rivers of possible conversation.
Also, Macey said, "Group work sucks though because all you want to do is talk..."
That's another BIG worry of mine. I'm already a bad procrastonator, and I'm really trying to do good in school. But, it's going to be hard with all the conversation in the airways.
I really just need to be focused on school right now.
Not much to say here, it's a boring class. I only know a handful of people. And, Mr. Cook is pretty lax. It seems like it may actually be an easy enough class.
That was my day.
It's short and sweet, no?
On: Monday, October 20, 2008
Obviously, it is worth it to go there and get a degree.
So, today I started my day by getting my schedule.
Walk in, and the volume is set to mute. I swear, not a single voice was risen. Though I was extremely anxious, my nerves were calmed when I saw that Victoria was in the class. The teacher, Mrs. Liska, was grading papers all period, and I got the impression that the class was more of a "Do it on your own" class.
Otherwise, the class was good, just boring.
Simply, it was fun. We played volleyball. I don't really know anybody in the class, but the people seem nice enough.
A-3: Interior Design
It's not a class full of people I know. Actually, I don't know anybody. But, the class is fun! I get to design... interiors :p
I really like it though, least, my first day was good.
A-4: World History
World History was alright. As is expected, there were plenty of people I knew in the class. It was pretty boring, and normal though. Mr. Self is quite a character though.
Really, school went great today.
Tomorrow will probably only be better.
On: Sunday, October 19, 2008
Sure, we have issues, but the fact is that we are trying to work around those.
Surely my grandpa is still not a hundred percent sure on is she's changed or not, but I am willing to give her a chance.
The visit went alright anyways.
Kinda' boring, but decent enough.
I also went to a party for an hour.
Nearly had a panic attack, but I did go.
I did go on a walk.
Tomorrow I start SCHOOL!
I'm really excited, but very nervous
I think I'll do alright though.
But, something disturbs me.
It turns out that I'm a big part of a few people's life.
Needless to say I have never thought of myself like that.
Macey described my position like this:
"It's like this" (holding her fist slightly apart)
but with me back "it's like this" (Pushing her fists together)
I make things work is kinda' what I got out of that.
It's an amazing feeling, being a big part of people's lives.
Thank God I lived ^-^
Thank God, Thank God, Thank God
I'm happy just thinking about everything.
It's good... very good.
Oh yes, if you have a blogger, follow me ^o^
Also, like usual tell other about my blog.
It'd be appreciated.
It sounds a bit like Tool to me :p
On: Saturday, October 18, 2008
It's awesome, and I now have text and internet :D
The fact is that it's nice, sleek, and to say the least, amazing.
The phone will send me an email when someone comments my blog :)
Which, is awesome.
Plus, I can blog on the go if I need to.
I'm very happy with the phone, and I will use it.
It also makes a great media player.
So, if you're looking for a great, small phone, this is the one for you :D
On: Friday, October 17, 2008
I am, to say the least, just trying to manage with my anxiety, and my desire.
I'm anxious because I will see so many people very soon.
but, I desire seeing them.
SO, it's cool right?
No, it makes my whole body ache. I am bursting with anticipation. my thoughts are confused.
So, I dream.
I dream of a life that I may, or may not have. I dream of a world that may or may not exist.
Just, I keep thinking of going to school, and seeing people.
A MASS of people.
It's nerve wrecking to someone whose spent 2 monthes going to school with a handful of guys that I also live with.
I also think about the people at Meridale. I feel for them because they still have those 7 to 9 lives.
They'd be in group right now. Talking about stuff.
Here I am at a computer, typing out my life.
Is that right?
I feel it is, but I can't be certain.
Nothing is certain.
I'm not sad, depressed, or angry.
Going from a place like Meridale, and then just coming home.
It's super strange.
I remember thinking today that I should have stayed at Meridale two more weeks.
If only for the comfort of not having to change.
But, I do have to change.
I can't stay there forever.
I have this feeling that when I really get back to school everything will be alright.
It'll reassure me.
Helk, today Bella trying to choke me to death (aka Hug) was reassuring in of itself.
But, I am, still anxious.
I'll blog tomorrow.
Maybe I'll actually have something to say :p
On: Thursday, October 16, 2008
For the past 2 monthes I have been at a treatment center getting better! And, it worked :D
I feel happier, more content, and, all in all, better. Flat-out better.
I'll post more later.
Gotta' get used to blogging again :p
- Back home
- Going back to school soon
I'm nervous because I already know that one guy hates me for what I did.
But, I got my friends, and my family.
So, I'll survive.
I'm really nervous about going back to school.
Not nervous that anything bad's going to happen. Just, that there will be frustrating people that hate me for my suicide attempt.
All I can do is prove I've changed, and show love in the face of hate.
Peace and what not.
That's something that's changed about me.
I can't stand violence, and killing anymore.
I even avoid killing insects now.
It's just, meaningless to harm things.
They do nothing to me, why should I effect them?
No reason too :)
And, I have my mantra, "It's not about winning or losing, just how much effort you put into it."
It's short, simple, honest, and easy to live by.
And I DO now.
I think I'll go.
I'm tired of my fingers moving :p
I'm not as good as I used to be at typing.
No music for now.
No reason for now.